"His wife said to him, 'Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!" He replied, "Are you talking like a foolish woman? Shall we accept the good from God and not trouble? In all this, Job did not sin in what he said." Job 2:9-10
What was it like like to have been married to the most tested man in the old testament? We don't know much about Job's wife. We don't even know her name. We have a distinct account of who, when, and what Job lost. We have an equal and accurate account of whom, when and what Job gained after his testing. We know the names of Job's friends who came to sit with him. We are given great detail of what they said. But not Job's wife. We know little about her. We know she was there in plenty, was there during his suffering, and was there after the testing to see God's blessings. We know a lot about Job, but we don't know much about his wife.
For example, we know what Job did when he heard his children all died, but not her. We know about her lifestyle before the test (riches, servants, children, friends, money, a great home), but we don't know the day to day struggle and added stress she went through as it all feel apart. We know how Job felt, but not how she felt when she woke up one day with everything and then lived many days with nothing and no assurance that it would change. We know Job suffered from horrible sores that he would pick at with broken pieces of clay, but we don't know what it was like for her to watch her strong provider who loved the Lord be reduced to a broken , flesh eaten man. Poor Job's wife.
She lived this horrific moment in time, and has become summed up as a joke that says, "The only thing God left him was a naggy wife." She is given two sentences and her lot in all of this has been cast by many as the additional curse. No one will truly know all of her, but I think there are some implications here that pastor's spouses would be wise to think about.
The first being that we don't know her name. Do you ever feel like that at church? Like, "Hey! My name isn't pastor Randy's wife. My name is Debbie. And I am not just the pastor's wife or the kids mom. I am a smart woman who has interests and opportunities." Personally, I don't really feel dismissed. I make a point not to be. Actually, I like being Randy's wife, but I think I enjoy that because I don't allow myself to be labeled as "just the wife." I have my own ministries, and life. Job's wife didn't really have a lot of options in her day.You and I have many options. Let's make them count.
Perhaps she felt, and this is my second point, trapped. Women had zero rights in those days. She had little option but to endure the hardship. We just had a training day at work last week. My boss brought in a nurse from the local Methodist Health Care Hospital. She talked about stress. Some symptoms were (PHYSICAL) fatigue, weight gain, rash, tension / (EMOTIONAL) anxiety, the "blues", mood swings, worrying, little joy / (SPIRITUAL) emptiness, loss of meaning, doubt, martyrdom, cynicism / (MENTAL) forgetfulness, low productivity, lethargy, whirling mind, dull senses / (RELATIONAL) isolation, intolerance, loneliness, hiding, nagging, distrust, fewer contacts with friends, and lashing out. Hmmm,I wonder? Do you think the biggest test of all time could foster any or all of these emotions?! Maybe you have felt like this? Maybe even now you feel trapped due to a problem or situation? I wish we knew if Job's wife had Godly friends. What could they have said that would have made her feel better? Maybe nothing at all. Perhaps just being there as a support would have helped. Do you have a support group of friends? You need them. You feel less trapped when you have others praying for you. Your husband should be your friend. If you need to, talk to a counselor.You have the ability to utilize those friends as prayer partners. "If two of you agree on earth about anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My father in heaven." Matthew 18:19 In addition we know as Christians that, "we are more than conquerors through Christ." We don't have to live a trapped life. We have a savior.
Thirdly, our words matter. I have never said curse God and die to Randy. I have said, "Why do you waste your time? Your ministry in that area... those people ...(fill in the rest)" Ugh! What if there was a chronicle about Randy's life and the only lines you heard about me were, "And she said unto Randall, You are wasting your time." I would yell out, "I demand a redo!" I have stood in the rain in a bunny suit holding a church sign! I have passed out more fliers than the national forest has trees. I only started liking coffee because a coffee house is the best place to meet. I care for our children when he is at meetings. Most importantly, I love this ministry too. Don't be a hater... I have had moments of weakness! Maybe you have too. Don't live there. We can ask for forgiveness and overcome.
I think Job's wife had a moment of weakness. The Hebrew word for curse is Masoretic. It actually means to bless. She was in effect saying, "Hey darlin', you are steadfast on the Lord no matter what. So, given all that has gone on in your life... why don't you bless (or curse) God and DIE... cuz it is pretty crudy! That is why she got such a harsh answer from Job when he called her foolish and said we are here for the good and the bad God brings. May I point out she stayed even when the ugliness seemed to be "winning". We know of her in one other account (Job 19) that she had to turn her head from him because his breath was so putrid due to his illness. Curse or bless, Job was right... God is with us in the good and bad. I hope she learned that. Pastor's wife you can overcome.
Don't miss this last point dear ones. There will be trouble, Christ assured us of that (John 16:33). But we live in the protection of the one who has overcome the world. Troubles and trials come, God is there and he is always faithful. Words matter because from the heart the mouth speaks. How is your heart? We don't know much about Job's wife, but we do know this; she was there to experience restoration. She had a husband who was strong when she couldn't be. She experienced more than she had before, and I think she loved all that God had given (pre-trial and post-trial), but I am sure she was changed by the trials...stronger some how. We don't hear from her again but we know they were blessed because of faithfulness to the Lord. Be faithful, if you curse or bless God and leave when it is hard, you will miss out on the blessings God will provide. Sometimes we have to leave a situation. Let's just make sure we aren't having a what's her name moment. God does some of his best work and blessings through us and in us when we are refined in the trials.
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid... for the Lord goes with you; He will never leave you or forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6
What was it like like to have been married to the most tested man in the old testament? We don't know much about Job's wife. We don't even know her name. We have a distinct account of who, when, and what Job lost. We have an equal and accurate account of whom, when and what Job gained after his testing. We know the names of Job's friends who came to sit with him. We are given great detail of what they said. But not Job's wife. We know little about her. We know she was there in plenty, was there during his suffering, and was there after the testing to see God's blessings. We know a lot about Job, but we don't know much about his wife.
For example, we know what Job did when he heard his children all died, but not her. We know about her lifestyle before the test (riches, servants, children, friends, money, a great home), but we don't know the day to day struggle and added stress she went through as it all feel apart. We know how Job felt, but not how she felt when she woke up one day with everything and then lived many days with nothing and no assurance that it would change. We know Job suffered from horrible sores that he would pick at with broken pieces of clay, but we don't know what it was like for her to watch her strong provider who loved the Lord be reduced to a broken , flesh eaten man. Poor Job's wife.
She lived this horrific moment in time, and has become summed up as a joke that says, "The only thing God left him was a naggy wife." She is given two sentences and her lot in all of this has been cast by many as the additional curse. No one will truly know all of her, but I think there are some implications here that pastor's spouses would be wise to think about.
The first being that we don't know her name. Do you ever feel like that at church? Like, "Hey! My name isn't pastor Randy's wife. My name is Debbie. And I am not just the pastor's wife or the kids mom. I am a smart woman who has interests and opportunities." Personally, I don't really feel dismissed. I make a point not to be. Actually, I like being Randy's wife, but I think I enjoy that because I don't allow myself to be labeled as "just the wife." I have my own ministries, and life. Job's wife didn't really have a lot of options in her day.You and I have many options. Let's make them count.
Perhaps she felt, and this is my second point, trapped. Women had zero rights in those days. She had little option but to endure the hardship. We just had a training day at work last week. My boss brought in a nurse from the local Methodist Health Care Hospital. She talked about stress. Some symptoms were (PHYSICAL) fatigue, weight gain, rash, tension / (EMOTIONAL) anxiety, the "blues", mood swings, worrying, little joy / (SPIRITUAL) emptiness, loss of meaning, doubt, martyrdom, cynicism / (MENTAL) forgetfulness, low productivity, lethargy, whirling mind, dull senses / (RELATIONAL) isolation, intolerance, loneliness, hiding, nagging, distrust, fewer contacts with friends, and lashing out. Hmmm,I wonder? Do you think the biggest test of all time could foster any or all of these emotions?! Maybe you have felt like this? Maybe even now you feel trapped due to a problem or situation? I wish we knew if Job's wife had Godly friends. What could they have said that would have made her feel better? Maybe nothing at all. Perhaps just being there as a support would have helped. Do you have a support group of friends? You need them. You feel less trapped when you have others praying for you. Your husband should be your friend. If you need to, talk to a counselor.You have the ability to utilize those friends as prayer partners. "If two of you agree on earth about anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My father in heaven." Matthew 18:19 In addition we know as Christians that, "we are more than conquerors through Christ." We don't have to live a trapped life. We have a savior.
Thirdly, our words matter. I have never said curse God and die to Randy. I have said, "Why do you waste your time? Your ministry in that area... those people ...(fill in the rest)" Ugh! What if there was a chronicle about Randy's life and the only lines you heard about me were, "And she said unto Randall, You are wasting your time." I would yell out, "I demand a redo!" I have stood in the rain in a bunny suit holding a church sign! I have passed out more fliers than the national forest has trees. I only started liking coffee because a coffee house is the best place to meet. I care for our children when he is at meetings. Most importantly, I love this ministry too. Don't be a hater... I have had moments of weakness! Maybe you have too. Don't live there. We can ask for forgiveness and overcome.
I think Job's wife had a moment of weakness. The Hebrew word for curse is Masoretic. It actually means to bless. She was in effect saying, "Hey darlin', you are steadfast on the Lord no matter what. So, given all that has gone on in your life... why don't you bless (or curse) God and DIE... cuz it is pretty crudy! That is why she got such a harsh answer from Job when he called her foolish and said we are here for the good and the bad God brings. May I point out she stayed even when the ugliness seemed to be "winning". We know of her in one other account (Job 19) that she had to turn her head from him because his breath was so putrid due to his illness. Curse or bless, Job was right... God is with us in the good and bad. I hope she learned that. Pastor's wife you can overcome.
Don't miss this last point dear ones. There will be trouble, Christ assured us of that (John 16:33). But we live in the protection of the one who has overcome the world. Troubles and trials come, God is there and he is always faithful. Words matter because from the heart the mouth speaks. How is your heart? We don't know much about Job's wife, but we do know this; she was there to experience restoration. She had a husband who was strong when she couldn't be. She experienced more than she had before, and I think she loved all that God had given (pre-trial and post-trial), but I am sure she was changed by the trials...stronger some how. We don't hear from her again but we know they were blessed because of faithfulness to the Lord. Be faithful, if you curse or bless God and leave when it is hard, you will miss out on the blessings God will provide. Sometimes we have to leave a situation. Let's just make sure we aren't having a what's her name moment. God does some of his best work and blessings through us and in us when we are refined in the trials.
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid... for the Lord goes with you; He will never leave you or forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6
This was Awesome and right on time for me. God bless you for sharing this..
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